Somewhere along the way you appear to have gained the reputation of being the strong, silent type, and it has only become worse since you began hanging around with Watanuki. By comparison, anyone looks quiet next to Watanuki.

In fact, he makes you feel somehow as if you are lacking in the emotional department by not taking your feelings and proclaiming them to the world at the top of your voice.

You think, maybe if you took the way he acts around Himawari and used it at a model he might notice the way you feel.

But then, putting aside the fact that it would make you look like an idiot, his very obvious, very vocal dislike of you would seem to imply any such venture would be just as fruitless as continuing on your current path.

--

You walk around the corner to see Himawari mouth "I'm sorry" and turn away from him.

You pause, but he's seen you, and you know that even though you are the absolute last person he wants to see right now, it would be worse to walk away.

He doesn't say anything as you walk up.

"She's protecting you," you say, and you might even be right.

"She knows I don't care about that," he says, and the catch in his voice makes you wince a little inside.

There is nothing you can say to that.

This isn't how you want him. You want him to see you, not the memory of a girl.

You try, the three of you, to continue your lunches as if nothing changed, and in the end it seems to work.

Perhaps he still sees you as his rival in love. Your relationship might seem strained, but Himawari is the same as ever, and Watanuki only overcompensates a little while trying to cover up.

--

Too late, you think, and the words don't seem enough to cover your feeling of failure as he falls to the ground.

He lives, of course - it wasn't a fatal wound, and you killed the demon before it could do any more damage.

But still, you were too late, and he was hurt.

You bring a bag of takeaway to his house, because he makes you lunch every day - the least you can do is feed him when he's injured.

You find him in the kitchen cooking dinner, despite the fact that his left arm is in a sling and he has six stitches on his chest.

You aren't any good at finding words to describe how you feel about him, but you manage to find "You're an idiot, go sit down and I'll finish this" somewhere.

You're not certain he quite understood, because he immediately starts arguing with you.

--

Yuuko orders you to stay with Watanuki for a few days.

You consider arguing, but Watanuki seems to be doing a pretty good job on his own.

That is, before he leaves in a huff.

"Why?" you ask, hesitating at the door as you follow him.

"Without a dream to cling to," she says, "he is faltering. He is very tasty to spirits right now." She blows smoke into the air and smiles as the coils swirl and dissipate.

You raise your eyebrows.

You think she winks at you. "You should tell him," she says, as you turn away to follow Watanuki.

"I don't need protecting," he snarls, as you catch up to him.

You nod.

"I lived on my own for years before I came here, I don't need--" He continues in this vein for some time, but you lose track of the his words as you think of Watanuki living with his spirits, alone, for so long.

At long last, Watanuki's rant draws to a close and he looks at you for a response.

"I'm worried about you," you say simply, and he just stares at you.

The remainder of the walk to Watanuki's house is blessedly silent.

--

Eventually you convince him to sit down and let you do things for him. The spare futon smells strongly of mothballs, but the last thing you want is for Watanuki to think you have any designs on his virtue, so you resolve to put up with it.

"Doumeki," he asks, "why haven't you asked Himawari out yet?"

Words fail you. Eventually, you manage to tell him that you aren't interested in Himawari.

"Then, why are you always hanging around with us?" he demands, clearly thinking your only purpose in life must be to torture him.

You consider your answer carefully. "You make me lunch," you point out, which sets Watanuki off into another rant about what an ungrateful wretch you are, which you settle in to ignore with a certain amount of relief.

"Are you laughing at me?" he demands, and you realise you must have been smiling. "You don't have to stay here, you know, I'm perfectly capable of --"

"Yuuko said I should," you say, firmly. "She knows this kind of thing." Actually, you strongly suspect she might actually just be making trouble, but you want to stay around to protect him, just in case...

As for telling him, the thought is ridiculous. Watanuki would probably just injure himself further with the resulting flailing.

--

Living so close to him, you can see even clearer that something isn't... quite... right.

On the first day of your stay, he gets attacked by a strange creature that lives in hair. While you privately, deep in your heart, think Watanuki looks quite cute with curls, the two of you manage to dispose of it in a timely fashion.

On the second day, you fight an ice demon.

On the third day, he almost gets eaten by an umbrella monster.

Watanuki doesn't seem to notice anything unusual about this, and continues to argue with you and try to make his own meals.

"Watanuki," you say, and he barely halts his current rant to look at you. You try again. "Kimihiro."

He stops, and you wonder if he'd forgotten he actually had a given name.

"I... you." You swallow. "I care. A lot. About you. That's why I hang around you. You. Not Himawari. You. So I want you to sit down, and let me take care of things. Okay?"

He stares at you.

"Okay?" you repeat.

"Okay," he says, in a small voice.

--

Two weeks later you finally pull together the courage to kiss him.

He blushes, but he doesn't push you away.

You consider that a victory.